10 Honest Things

I was tagged by my SIL, Dawn, so here it goes. If you are reading this, consider yourself tagged. The rules are I have to list 10 honest (and interesting, but that’s up to you) things about myself and then pass it on to other bloggers.

1. I'm neurotic when it comes to my son...guess I should probably start a "therapy savings account" for him now, while he is young. Really, I just don't want to do it wrong. He's our first, our only, our miracle and I've got one shot to get it right. No pressure.

2. I've stopped watching the news. So much of what passes as news isn't truly newsworthy, and the rest is just too painful. When you struggle with infertility and you turn on the news and every other story is about child abuse and neglect, it's just to much on the heart. The rest of it is SSDD (same stuff different day)- someone got shot, someone dealt drugs, the government is misusing my tax money, some people choose to sit on their asses instead of working an honest job, and there are way too many folks crowding our schools, our communities, and our healthcare systems illegally (I'm all for LEGAL immigration), the weather forecast is innacurate and there was traffic somewhere locally.

3. I'm an avid reader, so much so that if my only quiet time is midnight to 1am, I'll take that hour to read. I also like to write and would love to pursue that more, but I've not found a way to fit that into my schedule.

4. I love to travel. Most women I know spend their money at the spa, the salon, and on the latest fashions. I'll skip stocking the closet if that means I can go on another adventure. C's caught that bug too...started traveling with us at 3 months old and hasn't stopped.

5. I have a soft spot for German Shepherd Dogs. We've adopted two through rescue and their loyalty, intelligence, and ability to forgive are amazing. Our house isn't a home if it doesn't include a sheppie. The current one is neurotic, so we get along well.

6. Shhh...don't tell my hubby this one. He's usually the macho one, but when we decided to learn SCUBA and it was time to dive, we were off the coast of Cancun in very rough surf. When it was time to submerge, he freaked out a litle, so the dive master surfaced with M while I kept descending toward the reef. So there I was on my first dive, 25 feet down on the ocean floor, BY MYSELF, hoping I remembered how to breath, how to clear my mask, that a shark wouldn't eat me, etc. Childbirth proved I'm capable of just about anything, alone on the ocean floor confirmed it. And yes, M finally made it down there too, and had a great time.

7. I'll swim, kayak, board, snorkel, and dive in the ocean, but I get completely freaked out when it comes to swimming/tubing/skiing in a lake or river. I was 4 months pregnant and purposely snorkeled with sharks, but I would not take a swim in a very large lake. I sat in a ski tube and paddled around the cove...'cause you never know when a turtle, snake, or sunfish might get you!

8. I'm giving myself permission to stop investing in a friendship that no longer aligns with who I am. It's liberating.

9. Along the lines of Dawn's cryptic post, the cops once brought me home to my parents at about 2am on a Saturday...story for another time. However, I was not arrested.

10. I miss being thin, athletic, and fit. There, I said it.

Out of the Mouths of Babes

This week is "community helpers" week in C's kindergarten class, which is just another way to say career day for the little people set. I'm a consultant in the financial services industry; bet you've never heard a kid say "I want to grow up and do that!" No? Me neither. I am so very thankful my presentation does not follow the police's...how much of a killjoy would that be? I thought I'd ask C what he knows about my job.

Me: "C, what kind of work does Mama do?"

C: "You play on your computer and talk on the phone all day."

Me: "Is that all?"

C: "You tell people what to do. Sometimes you think they need a time out."

Me: "Ok, well, I also work to help people get the money they need to buy a home. How much do you think a house costs?"

C: "28,000 dollars."

How I wish!

Update on M

Update for family and friends; thanks for all of your thoughts and prayers.

If you are new to M's diagnosis, backstory is here. The quick summary is he was diagnosed with a pre-cancerous condition of the esophagus last March. One minute we were having Sunday dinner at my parents' house, and the next, we'd won a trip to the ER from our county's finest paramedics. After emergency surgery, we learned of M's diagnosis. We've not lost our sense of humor though; we all still joke that M's mother-in-law/my mom may have been trying to knock him off with the pot roast.

Today was surgery #4 and we're not much further ahead than when we started. #1 was the emergency last March, #2 was last October that confirmed high-dysplasia Barrett's, which won us a referral to a univerity medical center. Thankfully, one of the top docs for this condition is within a 1.5 hour drive, so we feel blessed we're not traveling beyond that. We met with this team in November and surgery #3 was in January. That surgery was supposed to be the first radiofrequency ablation of the dysplastic cells, but they did not use the BARRX HALO that day. Due to the high level of dysplasia, they ended up re-mapping the esophagus during that surgery, setting us up for surgery #4. M was a bit frustrated when he came to after #3, to learn that treatment had not begun.

So, today was the BIG day, surgery #4 and the first round of BARRX...and today we hit another barrier. While these are surgical procedures, they are done under very heavy sedation instead of general anesthesia. Even with the maximum "drug cocktail" today, and permission to go sligtly beyond the max, they could not get M sedated enough to complete the procedure. In technical terms it was, "M became combative and we finally had to abort the procedure." Simply put, though heavily sedated on quite the drug cocktail, M ended up trying to remove the scope and block the procedure. He, of course, has no memory of it thanks to a little thing called Versed®. Note to self: if ever shooting him with a tranq. dart, he's not going down easily. See, we still have a sense of humor around here. And he's quite funny when he comes to in the recovery room, always asking for the car keys and today I even got to hear, "He doesn't even have his license Lisa. Gimme da keys!" in perfect Weird Science pitch. You never know what he is going to come up with.

Now M's won a trip to the preoperative anesthesia center, to be cleared for general anesthesia and all future surgeries will be under general. This appointment should take place in the next 2-3 weeks, and surgery within the next 4 weeks. They are eager to get the first surgery down, as the longer the pre-cancerous cells remain untreated, the longer the greater threat remains and grows. We are thankful for such skilled care being nearby, but it makes for an exhausting day full of travel, navigating the downtown area, navigating the hospital system, and just waiting...waiting for surgical prep, procedure, recovery, discharge. I've learned I'm not a very good "waiter." We were both spent by the time we got home, and so thankful my parents offered to watch C a little later. M and I came home and crashed- he woke up for dinner and is back to resting comfortably.

Thank you for all of the prayers and well wishes! More to come over the next 2-4 weeks.

More Out of the Mouths of Babes

Taking C to the doctor this afternoon...

C: "When is Uncle Rudy's birthday?"

Me: "In seven days...what would you like to give him as a gift?"

C: "A country club shirt and a razor."

Me: "A razor?"

C: "Yes, a razor! He needs to shave!"

Me: "Where does he need to shave?"

C: "I don't know, but he needs to shave. He's got hair everywhere."

And there you go- who would have thought of a Gillette as a birthday gift?

Out of the Mouths of Babes

C walked in on us talking about M's surgery tomorrow...

"Daddy's having surgery?"

"Yes, remember? They have to fix his throat."

Silence...thinking...

"Are they gonna cut his head off to get to it? Will they stich it back on when they're done?"

Bad Blogger

Yep, that's me, a bad blogger! It's been a bit overwhelming lately keeping up with C and work, let alone, the basics such as the house, laundry, etc. , which still need to get done. The good news is I have a happy, healthy child and work is going well and balanced. The bad news? My house needs a serious cleaning and decluttering! If baby steps count, then let's count that I got the pantry cleaned out today and the grocery shopping done. It's the little victories I have to savor these days!

Spring is in full bloom here and absolutely beautiful! This has inspired me to hopefully turn my black thumb with houseplants into a green thumb. So far, we have 6 new houseplants and they are all still alive and well- yeah! Yes, it is the little things. We are also getting ready to tear off the old deck and replace it with a new one (the work is never done), and this has forced us to look at the backyard with a fresh set of eyes. The bad news? Our huge shed will need to be moved and a small tree taken down. The great news? We think we may have enough sun on one spot to FINALLY plant a garden! So, by summer our goal is a new deck, some grass growing in the backyard, and a veggie garden. To get things started, I planted about 150 seeds in starter packs this weekend...lots of work, but hopefully, full of rewards. My goal is to use some to start our garden and others will be Mother's Day gifts, grown with love. And I'm so excited that my Nana will be visiting for Mother's Day this year, so she can take some plants home for her garden as well.

Photos to come soon; in the meantime, happy spring!

Out of the Mouths of Babes

C and our neighbor were playing outside on this beautiful day, and C asked if they could come inside to play a game. I said no, that it was nice out and we were staying outside. The boys pushed the issue and I told them no again, that it was nice, we were staying outside, and C could not have friends in to play since he's not cleaned his bedroom or his playroom, to which his playmate replied...

"Doesn't C's maid clean his room?"

Me: "C doesn't have a maid; he has to clean his own room."

"Oh, well I don't have my OWN maid; she's my mom's maid, but she still cleans my room."

Me: "I don't have a maid."

Neighbor looked at me like I was out of my ever loving mind and says...

"Well, sometimes my mom cleans my room. I bet you could clean C's?"

Nice try.